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The First Date
2005-01-24 / 11:24 a.m.
To hear those dreaded words. You wouldn't think it would come as quite of shock; but it did. I was terrified of this day, the day I would hear these words...
"Mom, can I have my girlfriend over?"
I felt a grey hair coming on at just the sound of my thirteen year olds voice.
My response "we'll see." This followed by the wails of my eleven year old who isisted he was also old enough to have a girlfriend and have her over as well. I ultimately told him no that he was not old enough and reminded him that his brother did not have his girlfriend over when he was eleven. "That's because you wouldn't let him" Precisely my point, Einstein. I love him but sometimes his mouth runs faster than his brain. So back to my eldest.
I submitted and let him have his girlfriend over. I met her mom, very nice and I assured her that I would be home all day. The girl, also thirteen was quiet, polite, very dainty (in appearance)and gave a first good impression.
So we watched movies. I fixed some popcorn and cheesepuffs which she nibbled, and I do mean nibbled on, and she didn't touch the soda or koolaid. I offered water and she declined. One of his other friends showed up and god love him, he is not a bad kid but he can get on your nerves in no time. Anyway he decided to pick on the girlfriend and she walloped him with a pillow and sent him for a loop as my son just watched on. I died laughing. He definately got someone who can take care of herself. She didn't give my son time to intervene. I'm glad he found a strong girl that doesn't treat him like crap. They were mutual and I hope that is instilled in his brain forever. There's no reason to walk on someone or be walked on.
She did end up staying for dinner. Not very impressive I'm afraid, I hadn't planned on company. But never fear, her nibbling persisted and after a small salad, some pears and a couple of bites of soup... she proclaimed she was "stuffed". Oh yeah and a couple of sips of milk. I did mention to my son that it was okay for her to eat and he stated she's always that picky. I did see him sneak the question to her mom and found out she's always been like that and she's like that at home as well. Good, I was afraid my cooking was that bad! Alright, I was afraid she was one of these girls who starved themselves to near death to maintain their iddy biddy figure. My son assures me she eats, just not much and she doesn't give me the impression that her brain is starving from lack of food so my fears are noted but set aside.
So after dinner I cleaned up. The boys all helped clear the table etc but I wasn't going to interfere with the "love birds" as I knew her mom would be there within the half hour to get her. I go into the living room and there they are snuggled like two bugs in a rug on the couch. I felt another hair go grey.
We have an open discussion about sex and relationships in this house so nothing comes as a surprise. I'd rather if it is going to happen that he be prepared. BUT... I'd also rather it didn't happen quite this early, so I reiterate this several times to him and he assures me it is not to that point. Please don't be at that point any time soon. Please, please, please!
I remember seventh grade. Cripe I remember the same couples dating in fifth grade and pretty much staying within the same circle through high school. I know that it is normal to want to have a girlfriend so I am trying to be supportive. In the meantime, I'll just die the grey hairs.
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